Thursday, June 12, 2008

Labor, Re-Lived: EXHAUSTED.

I just re-wrote my experience of labor for a friend considering home birth and I am completely wiped out and scared out of my pants to push another baby out.
Sign me up for the epidural, heck, schedule the c-section. As long as my baby is OK--(But o crap, do you think epidurals cause autism?) and I can walk after I deliver it, I will be a happy camper.
The thing is with all this hospital vs home birth crap is that what really matters is trusting God in the process and with the outcome.
Let me explain my blanket statement.
Whether you have a baby at home or in the hospital, you have to be trusting God that at home, if something goes wrong, or if your labor goes long, that God is in control and holding you and your baby. If you are at the hospital, and you have the drugs or the c-section, you have to trust God that they will not ruin you or your baby, and that He is still holding you and your baby. And with the outcomes too: at home, you come to terms that your baby could die. You could die. The same thing happens in the hospital. The same thing happens to all of us.
My point is it doesn't matter where you labor. You do what you want to do--what your heart and mind and soul tells you will be the best for YOU and YOUR BABY, and then you say, "That's my decision God. Now hold me." Your trust is not in pain medication or lack there-of, in c-sections or lack there-of, or even in "a healthy baby". Your trust is in the Creator, who gives us life, and takes it away. All the details are quite stupid to get hung up on, not saying they aren't important. But they are not ultimately important.
I hate the fighting, back and forth. It is what it is: a baby, a mama, a miracle and one of life's most memorable moments, no matter how it happens.

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