I don't know how to start this post, I don't even really have a clue what I want to say, but my favorite writer says in times like these, you just take it bird by bird; in other words, just start typing.
I've been in one of those moods lately, filled with lots uncertainty, like I'm deaf and blind, suddenly, trying to make my way day to day without messing everything up. By everything I mean my life, what I think it is supposed to look like.
We are twenty five and have a house and two cars and a kid and two dogs and two good full time jobs. This is what we have been strving for since we got married, four and a half years ago. And it works. It's working now, but it doesn't have any of the glitter it had when we were dreaming it up five years ago. It's comfortable, and I can be content here, but there is a yearning for something different.
It seems there are two yearnings, to desires pulling at the heart: to settle, and to fly. Maybe someday I will feel like I am doing both, settling into something that makes me fly, if that makes any sense.
Our dreams are sensitive, vulnerable things.
"God works all things for the good to those who love Him and are called according to His purposes...."